Explore the negative consequences of over-sharing ideas in conversations – how adding too much value may hinder communication and create unnecessary tension.
Our innate desire to contribute to others is understandable. However, there’s a fine line between being helpful and overwhelming others with one’s personal opinions. The tendency to inject our ideas into every discussion, regardless of their relevance, can lead to a variety of negative outcomes. As such, for those who wish to climb to greater heights in life, it is necessary that they learn to refrain from the bad habit of adding too much value.
Highlights
- Adding too much value is the habit of excessively interfering in others’ work, often driven by a desire for control or a belief that one’s input is always superior. Its common signs include overemphasis on personal expertise, lack of attention, premature closing of discussions, micromanagement, critical feedback without constructive input, discouragement of creativity, favoritism, and resistance to change.
- When we try to add too much value, we risk delivering disconnected ideas, overshadowing others’ perspectives, dismissing original ideas, and undermining people’s growth potential.
- Reasons for this bad habit include the command-and-control style, self-assurance, talented member syndrome, and a lack of awareness of its negative impact on people’s enthusiasm and commitment.
- To stop adding too much value, one should practice self-awareness, embrace information sharing, and master the art of active listening and questioning.
What is Adding Too Much Value?
Adding too much value refers to one’s tendency to excessively interfere with others’ work. It is a manifestation of the desire to win at all costs, which is particularly common among those who have achieved a certain level of success.
Whether at work or in life, we often fall into the trap of consistently injecting our personal opinions into all discussions. We feel compelled to provide answers to the challenges faced by those around us. This is a common mindset among those in leadership positions:
- Are the team members struggling to define their professional development goals? I can provide them with valuable ideas.
- Are they unsure about the next steps for an ongoing project? I will give some insightful suggestions for them to consider.
- etc.
Many leaders assume that their primary responsibility is to alleviate obstacles, solve problems, and chart a collective path forward for team members. Whenever approached with a question or issue, their immediate instinct is to find a solution without delay.
While it is essential to offer one’s insights and perspectives from time to time, excessive involvement often results in unintended consequences. Therefore, one needs to strike a balance between providing guidance and promoting autonomy.
Signs of Adding Too Much Value
- Overemphasis on expertise: Instead of encouraging others’ growth, you provide solutions without allowing them to work on their own capabilities.
- Lack of attention: Multitasking and not giving your full attention to others during discussions hinders effective communication and diminishes their sense of importance.
- Prematurely closing discussions: By interrupting and shutting down conversations too quickly without allowing everyone to express their opinions, you discourage open dialogue and diverse perspectives.
- Micromanagement tendencies: Excessive control and a lack of trust in people’s abilities may cause one to resort to micromanagement.
- Criticism without constructive feedback: Failing to provide constructive input or recognition for others’ efforts just demotivates and prevents them from learning and growing.
- Discouragement of creativity and collaboration: Imposing rigid guidelines and stifling creative thinking.
- Favoritism: Treating certain people differently undermines team morale and breeds a sense of inequality.
- Resistance to change: The inability to adapt to new situations or challenges.
If you find yourself exhibiting any of the above-mentioned signs, it’s time for some reflection and re-assessment. Being a “control freak” only gives rise to a toxic environment characterized by low morale and innovation.
The Pitfalls of Adding Too Much Value
Have you ever found yourself eagerly lined up to hear a manager speak – only to be bombarded with a string of disconnected ideas?
It’s as if the management simply verbalizes whatever thoughts come to their mind – without a clear and cohesive message. You feel frustrated to have invested the time and attention, only to end up gaining nothing valuable at all.
Similarly, have you seen this situation? In a meeting, whenever someone presents a brilliant idea, the team leader immediately overshadows it with their own perspectives. Something like this:
“Good idea; however, it’d be better if you tried it this way…”
Not only is that “control freak” undermining the roles of other team members, but they are also publicly dismissing the original idea’s viability. As a result, people are left with the impression that only the leader’s opinions seem to matter.
For those who have achieved a certain level of success, it is quite challenging to listen to information they already know, without immediately responding with something like:
- “I already knew that”
- “There’s a much better solution”
- etc.
This instinctual reaction stems from the belief that they possess greater knowledge than others.
Adding too much value, even if it comes from good intentions, actually hampers the creation of value. It stifles the exchange of diverse ideas, limits collaboration, and undermines people’s growth potential.
Read more: Not Listening – The Silent Killer of Relationships and Success in Life
Reasons for Adding Too Much Value
The tendency to add too much value partially stems from the command-and-control style, which used to be very popular in traditional workplace environments. Even though things have changed since then, countless people/ organizations find it hard to abandon the old management approach. Rather than empowering team members to take ownership, they prefer micromanagement, believing it would ensure the highest quality of deliverables.
Aside from that, leaders these days often find themselves succumbing to this bad workplace habit due to a combination of reasons, including:
- Confidence in having the solution: Having climbed the ranks to lead a team, most leaders possess a certain level of expertise and proficiency. This self-assurance prompts many to believe that they hold the answers to all problems within the team.
- Talented member syndrome: In various cases, due to the popular recognition for their abilities, they tend to have opinions on how work should be approached and executed (i.e: the desire to “run the show” and make sure that things are done in the way they want/ think they should be).
- Self-expression and usefulness: Offering personal input allows leaders to express themselves and enjoy a sense of usefulness. They believe that by actively providing guidance to others, they are fulfilling their role and contributing positively to the team’s progress.
- An innate desire to help: Leaders typically have a genuine desire to assist others. When confronted with a problem, their default response is to provide a solution, driven by their instinctive inclination to support and guide team members.
It is crucial to recognize that, in most cases, people do not intentionally interfere with others’ work simply to showcase expertise. Rather, their act of adding too much value stems from deeply ingrained instincts, which they may not be even aware of.
Let’s consider the following conversation:
Employee: I am streamlining the logistics process to ensure that we can produce 100 accessories by Saturday.
Manager: Excellent! That’s great news. With five days remaining, let’s aim to produce a minimum of 20 accessories per day. Since packing tends to be time-consuming, let’s increase your quota to 25 per day. This way, you’ll have some extra time to spare.
In the example above, the manager quickly offers a solution, even though the employee never explicitly mentions that they have a problem. In that case, how can the employee develop independent management skills, if the manager consistently guides them without allowing autonomy?
Conversations like that, if they occur occasionally, may not immediately cause problems. However, if they become too frequent, they will eventually contribute to an environment where individuals habitually seek solutions from their leaders, even when fully capable of resolving issues on their own.
Consequences of Adding Too Much Value
Many leaders find comfort in assuming the role of the “host,” orchestrating and directing everything performed by their team. However, this management philosophy hampers the growth of the team in various significant ways.
Now, imagine an employee, brimming with enthusiasm, entering your office to share a fresh idea. Instead of responding with a simple acknowledgment like “Great idea,” you reply with something like,
“That’s indeed a great idea. Have you considered incorporating this additional tactic?”
What would happen then?
Unbeknownst to you, you unintentionally diminish the employee’s enthusiasm. While the quality of the idea may have increased marginally by 5%, their initial enthusiasm may have dropped by a staggering 50%. The idea no longer remains their own; it becomes yours now.
To cultivate a more conducive work environment, it is crucial to strike a balance between refining the quality of ideas and preserving the genuine ownership of team members.
Read more: Taking Credit for Others’ Work – A Detrimental Habit
Letting Go of Control
During a coaching session, Dr. Marshall Goldsmith posed a question to JP Garnier, the former CEO of GlaxoSmithKline:
“Since I became your executive coach, what have you learned that has had the greatest impact on your leadership?”
In response, JP Garnier shared an invaluable lesson that not only made him a better leader – but also brought greater happiness to his life. According to him, the coaching journey had taught him the significance of pausing before speaking, taking a deliberate breath, and asking himself,
“Is what I’m about to say truly worth saying?”
Through this simple practice of self-questioning, Garnier realized that half of what he had intended to say was better left unsaid. Despite his belief that he could contribute more to the collective good, he learned that the benefits of silence far outweighed the urge to provide input.
For those in leadership positions, we need to pay attention to how we motivate and provide feedback to our members.
If you find yourself frequently uttering phrases such as “Great idea, but…” or “Nevertheless,” stop immediately. Take a moment to inhale deeply and reflect on whether what you are about to say is truly important.
How to Stop Adding Too Much Value
Gauge your level of contribution
A certain sense of self-awareness is crucial to breaking free from the habit of adding too much value.
If you notice a recurring pattern where your ideas overshadow others, it’s a clear signal that you should step back and start appreciating others’ valuable contributions.
For instance, let’s say an employee proposes an innovative idea during a meeting. Rather than immediately interjecting with your own thoughts, it’s better to practice restraint and encourage further input from others. This inclusive approach not only empowers other individuals – but also cultivates a collaborative environment that promotes diverse perspectives and solutions.
Embrace information sharing
Effective discussions require that all participants have a comprehensive understanding of the subject matter. By providing complete information upfront, you equip them with the necessary context to contribute meaningfully, while preventing lopsided conversations driven solely by your knowledge.
Consider implementing a systematic approach to information sharing. Compile all relevant details, objectives, key discussion points, and limitations in a central location accessible to everyone involved. This comprehensive overview serves as a roadmap for constructive exchanges, where each person may contribute based on a shared understanding.
Now, let’s say you are organizing a strategy discussion. By sharing essential market research, customer insights, and competitive analysis, you empower your team to provide informed input and innovative ideas, leading to more effective decision-making.
Master the art of active listening and questioning
When you feel the urge to share personal opinions, reframe your input as a broad, open-ended question. For example, rather than providing a direct suggestion like, “Have you thought about spending an hour at the beginning of your workday for this project?” rephrase it as,
“Have you explored alternative approaches to organizing your work schedule?”
Such a change invites genuine conversation, allowing team members to contribute their own insights and propose diverse solutions.
Avoid Acting Like a Know-it-all
As we ascend to greater heights, our focus must be shifted from personal to collective success. As Lao Tzu has said:
A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: “We did it ourselves.”
To combat the habit of adding too much value, one must resist the temptation of constantly showcasing expertise in every discussion. Instead, create opportunities for others to demonstrate their capabilities.
When someone presents an idea, encourage them to delve deeper into the details and defend their viewpoints. That way, you help nurture their confidence, promote critical thinking, and cultivate the ability to articulate their ideas effectively.
Final Thoughts
While the desire to contribute is natural, it’s essential to recognize that quality trumps quantity. Sometimes, the most valuable thing we can do is to simply listen. By being mindful of our contributions and respecting the space of others, we contribute to more meaningful and productive conversations.
Compiled with inspiration from the bestseller ‘What got you here won’t get you there‘ by Dr. Marshall Goldsmith
Other resources you might be interested in:
- Habits in Personality Development: A Comprehensive Guide
- Not Saying Thank You: Why Do We Often Fail to Express Gratitude?
- Passing Judgment: Reasons to Stop This Destructive Habit
Let’s Tread the Path Together, Shall We?